When my male friend asked me to blog about online dating from the guy’s point of view, I thought what better way than to set up a profile of a guy and see for myself. I have started to blog on this topic to show what women go through. But now I’m representing the males out there. So ladies, pay attention to what I have to say!
Let me start off by saying I already have a newfound appreciation for men and what they go through – and I have barely even started. The action of guys online: picture tumbleweeds blowing in the desert. Whereas my female profile got 119 emails in 12 hours, and the emails are still coming in like waves, my male profile only had 2 emails in 12 hours. A lousy 2 emails…WHAT??
I was very careful in choosing the guy I wanted to be. I approached an acquaintance on Facebook who I knew from mutual friends has NO problem getting the ladies when they go out. He’s an absolute cutie, very clean cut and dresses well. In fact, I had a hard time finding pictures on his Facebook page to use because he had a swarm of pretty girls on him in most. He agreed to let me use his pictures for my experiment, and I made him into every woman’s dream.
The profile: His name is Mike, a 32 year old general contractor, no kids. He likes to watch sports, snowboard, and race fast cars. A real “man’s man” who works with his hands, but still likes to cook and is hoping to “make memories with that one special someone.”
C’mon this guy is like a dream come true for most girls – and being it that I wrote his profile, he can even spell and construct proper paragraphs. So how did the “male me” only get two emails??!!??
If the emails were from women to write home about, it wouldn’t have been so bad. But one of them had purple hair and more pictures of her tattoos than she did of herself. So I said to myself, “It looks like I’m going to have to make the effort here.”
I started scrolling through profiles. I decided “Mike” was going to pursue your every day average girl at first to just see the kind of response he would get. So I start throwing out emails to see who bites. I actually read the profiles and send messages alluding to something in their profile to let them know I pay attention. For me, this was important when I had a profile because it showed me that the guy actually took the time to read what I had to say and come up with something more original than just “hi” or “beautiful.”
I send out about 30 emails, and get four responses. I’m not impressed. Wow, guys really need to work hard here. As a female, when I would send out five emails, I would always at a minimum go 4 out of 5. So I was with one of my male friends yesterday, and I confirm with him that it is hard for guys. He said, “See, I tell you this all the time. Women are impossible. Their expectations are way too high. Guys have to send out at least 50 emails to get a couple of bites.” He’s got a point, but then drives it home even further when he says, “And then we are expected to pay.”
So while I understand that guys have it tough, I also know that any reasonably attractive girl is getting BOMBARDED as I’ve already demonstrated in my previous blog. So there are two sides to the story, but girls definitely have the advantage here.
But are women’s expectations too high? I am beginning to think so.
One woman I emailed was a reasonably attractive 40-something year old. I showed her to my friend, Jay, and he confirmed, “Her face is a little tired, but I would definitely take her out” (and he said do other things to her, but this is not an X-rated blog). In her profile, she states that she likes a guy to be at least 5’ 9” because she likes to wear heels. Well Mike is 5’ 9” so I thought I’d give it a shot. Even as a woman, I am thinking in my head this lady is going to eat up the attention of a guy that is cute AND ten years younger. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Here is an excerpt of the conversation below.
I am starting to concede that guys have it tough. I’ll be back to report on the male perspective again – and you won’t believe what I have to say next. Team Elizabeth or Team Mike – I have to say there is no competition. Mike, and all the other single guys of this world, definitely got their work cut out for them. I have only just started to dabble in the world of online dating for men. But as a woman, I am even beginning to ask, “What DO girls really want?” Stay tuned.