Before social media, Facebook and dating sites, we had Tommy Grand and the show Cheaters. I was a faithful viewer of the white trash TV show and loved to watch the look on the cheater’s face as he or she got caught on national television being a lying, deceptive scum bag. Today, we have the power of the Internet to do what Tommy Grand did – and we can do it right from the comforts of the couch in our pajamas.
Between my line of work and my online dating experiences, I scare myself sometimes with what I can find online or the clever ideas I use to find out what I want when I can’t find it on the Internet. I have a good friend who is a director of security at a large retailer and a certified “ethical hacker” who was confident he could find something on my ex-narcissist that I had not been able to. Well, as he came back with information, I said, “Already knew that one” to which he replied, “You’re pretty good.”
After my recent blog about the plethora of people who are engaged or married but still have an online dating profile, I got a private message from a friend on Facebook asking me to help her. She thought a guy who she was dating was going on Plenty of Fish because she thought she saw the app open on his phone one day. She wasn’t sure, but said he had been “acting different” and becoming distant so she thought he might be seeing other people. Fake profile time, I told her. I gave her permission to use my pictures (she lives an airplane ride away so he will never know) and told her to create a profile. So let’s have some fun with this.
The profile: My name is Elizabeth, and I am a 33 year old special education teacher with one child. I like camping, dancing and roller coasters, and I am “looking to meet someone who will constantly challenge me to be the best person I can be.” BARF!!
So while my friend is off trying to catch a cheater, I thought I’d have some fun with my fake profile to offer yet another glimpse into the world of online dating. First, a note to the guys who read this blog: the competition is tough for you out there. I am far from a supermodel, but in just 12 hours, my profile got 119 emails, 92 people checked that they wanted to Meet Me (a POF feature similar to the “wink” feature on Match that people use to flirt or let you know they’re interested), and 56 people added me as a Favorite. This is exactly why I never lasted more than two weeks on POF when I did have a real profile.
I just checked the inbox last night and started reading profiles of people I will never meet and deleting some of the emails. For every one I would delete, two more would come in. The age range of potential dates from what I have looked at so far is HUGE – from 23 to 55 years old. Obviously the best looking ones grab my attention first. My plan is to be as silly and flirty as possible and just see where the conversations go.
GUY TIP 1: Be more original than just saying “hi”
Seriously, I got 119 emails in 12 hours! You need to be more original. Write something witty, thoughtful, or fun to grab the girl’s attention. Every other email I opened just said “hi” so I decided that for every email which only had that one word, I was going to respond with the word “low” to see how a guy would respond. Here is an example of one conversation (LADIES, THIS GUY WAS SUPER CUTE).
I’m also having fun by bringing out my flirty side to see what it takes for a conversation to turn bad or inappropriate. I posted on this topic last week in DEFENSE OF GUYS because sometimes girls ask for it and then complain when all men want is sex so I wanted to test the waters here. Here is an example of one conversation below (A VERY CUTE ARMY CAPTAIN, LADIES).
Let me go sift through the POF rubble some more. I hope to find something interesting to report back again here soon (and hopefully, it’s not a cheating boyfriend).